LOLheads – The Scut Farkus Belichick

Posted by The Gimcracker in LOLheads, Sports on 07. Dec, 2007 | 2 Comments

What is it with me and blog series? I’ve horribly neglected my Berating system and I haven’t been feeding my TopFivers. I promise I’ll do better. Maybe soon I’ll come out with a Berating for Ratatooine. In spite of my better judgments I’m opening up a new series entitled LOLheads. I have no idea what [...]

Look Very Closely: Belichick Actually Resembles Some Infamous Villains

Posted by The Gimcracker in LOLheads, Movies, Sports on 04. Dec, 2007 | 5 Comments

After fumbling through archives of old Bill Belichick photos, I’ve stumbled upon some shots that I’ve never noticed before. If you look closely, you can see that Belichick resembles some of the more infamous antagonists of our time. I just can’t believe I never noticed it before.

Top Fiver: Blacklisted Films

Posted by The Gimcracker in Beratings, Movies, Top Fivers on 13. Nov, 2007 | 9 Comments

Imagine the worst movie you’ve ever seen, and then take that movie and replace the dialog with Chinese, the soundtrack with the constant squeak of a rusty shopping cart wheel, the lead actress with Angelina Jolie, and the director with Satan.

These are my current all-time least favorite movies, thus they have been etched into the annals of The Blacklist. And let me tell you, it’s a very dark place down there. It’s darker’n a black steer’s tookus on a moonless prairie night.

Top Fiver: My Favourite Explosions

Posted by The Gimcracker in Science, Top Fivers on 06. Nov, 2007 | 1 Comment

Actually, can I retract that? It’s really not appropriate to come up with any kind of favorites list when dealing with such topics as explosions, violence, war, etc. That being said, let’s do 2 things: 1. Realize no one was hurt in most of these explosions 2. Pretend the ones that were are teh bad [...]

Transformers: 4/10 Berating

Posted by The Gimcracker in Beratings, Movies on 21. Aug, 2007 | 11 Comments

I understand this is a little belated. I understand 10,000 people have blogged on this film. I understand everyone and their mom has seen it and loved it. You’re still not getting out of your Berating. I’m just putting it out there – you’re welcome to pick it up or send it right back my [...]

The Bourne Ultimatum: 1/10 Berating

Posted by The Gimcracker in Beratings, Movies on 06. Aug, 2007 | 6 Comments

The Bourne Ultimatum is the third and final installment of the trilogy about former CIA assassin Jason Bourne. I must say, I was blown away. The Good The cinematography, score, directing, acting, stunt effects, and plethora of settings were all superb. This movie did something that few movies are able to accomplish, especially in this [...]

1408 Pleasantly Surprises; Receives 3/10 Berating

Posted by The Gimcracker in Beratings, Movies on 18. Jul, 2007 | 2 Comments

I was expecting one of two things, either a supernatural demon/spirit filled journey into the depths of hades, or a slasher film. 1408 was neither (although closer to the former than the latter). Think The Shining meets Identity. The Good John Cusack one-mans most of the movie (based on a short story by Stephen King) [...]

Beratings Cometh

Posted by The Gimcracker in Beratings, Movies on 11. Jul, 2007 | 3 Comments

Don’t you hate it when that list of 10 movies you’ve been dying to see suddenly escapes your memory as soon as you enter Blockbuster? I’ve decided to start rating the movies I’ve seen, not because I think anyone actually cares what my opinion is, but because I find myself frequently forgetting what they were [...]

I Shouldn’t Have Posted The Last Top Fiver

Posted by The Gimcracker in Reference Burst Theory, Top Fivers on 27. Jun, 2007 | 8 Comments

Not five minutes after I published this post in which I go into some detail about amusement park accidents, a girl’s feet were both severed above the ankle by the Superman Tower of Power (formerly known as The Hellivator) at Kentucky Kingdom. These kinds of things do not happen very often. To have something like [...]

Top Fiver #3: Things You Didn’t Know About Paramount’s King’s Island

Posted by The Gimcracker in Top Fivers on 21. Jun, 2007 | 12 Comments

I started seeing commercials for King’s Island about a month ago, just like every May, and I noticed that it is no longer called “Paramount’s King’s Island”. The “Paramount’s” has been removed, which prompted me to check out the website and see what happened. A couple hours of wikipedia research, a sandwich, four Beer 30s, [...]

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