I hope you didn’t turn on the Grammy Awards last night. I mistakenly did, and here are my observations:
1) 99% of the music performed and honored is top 40, bubble gum, over-played hornswaggle. The Grammys have become an awards ceremony honoring artists with the top music sales, not the top music. I consider the millions they’ve earned from their record sales to be award enough, why do we have to give them a trophy, too?
2) The 1% of music that is not terrible never wins and is only included in an attempt to quell the feelings of people like me. I don’t know, maybe I used to think this type of music was good, but listening to The Sixty One has opened my eyes to truly good music.
3) Kanye West’s record sales will plummet from here on out. He lost way more fans last night than he gained. If you didn’t see it, you probably slept more soundly last night than I did, for I now know of an evil that exists in this world, so arrogant, that it could overthrow nations and wipe out civilizations.
This man was given 10 minutes of Grammy air time to perform, the most elaborate set I’ve ever seen, and a Grammy, and what does he do? He throws it back in our faces.
During his acceptance speech, he said something about “hip hop is dead” or “hip hop is not dead” or something of this nature, and was rambling on incoherently for way too long. Well, they politely turned on the music to signal he should wrap it up. Then he got angry about the music and said “aw naw, ya’ll ain’t gonna turn on the music on me, are ya’ll?” and continued to talk over the music for another 30 seconds.
Finally, he proclaimed that it was “bad taste” for them to keep playing the music while his eminence was accepting his award, so they shut it off and gave up the fight. Then when he finally got them to turn off the music…. HE HAD NOTHING TO SAY. That’s right, it finally got quiet, and then he forgot what he was even saying (or realized he had nothing to say in the first place), and wasted all of our time.
I bet the producers were so angry. No, Kanye, we don’t have any other awards to give to anyone else, there are no shows on TV after this one, we all just came to see you tonight, and you can have everything you want if you just cry about it loudly enough. I wish I had footage of it, but I guess it hasn’t been posted online yet. You’ll see it. It’ll be on every entertainment news show this week.
4) I knew before I turned it on that there would be three particular artists involved in some capacity with the Grammys. I could just feel it. These three artists are in every awards show. Even if they don’t have a current album or anything. You just know you are going to see them perform for some reason. I’m talking about Kanye West, Beyonce, and Fergie. I was right. They all three performed. Beyonce doesn’t even have an album out. I’m losing hope that humanity will win the fight.
5) Foo Fighters performed the same song on SNL, the MTV awards, and The Grammys all within the same couple months. We’ve all seen them play it. Why are they still around? What are they doing right now to capture our attention? I don’t get why they keep getting invited back to the same awards shows to do the same music. Don’t get me wrong, I’m a huge Foo Fighters fan, but that doesn’t change my observation.
6) Are you kidding me? Are we still on the Beatles? Why do they continue to saturate our lives? The Grammys were all about the Beatles last night for some reason. They’re a little late to jump on the bandwagon, don’t you think? I’m not necessarily angry about this, I’m just a little concerned. The Beatles could either be sent from heaven, or they could be minions of the Devil. It’s really hard to tell.
Those are the things that really got under my skin last night. If I could sum up the show in 10 words or less it would be Kanye West, The Beatles, and unoriginal, uninspired music. Does that really sound like a show you’d want to watch? The only bright points of the night were when Feist performed, and when Vince Gill got up on stage and totally BURNED Kanye West for his arrogant behavior. I can’t remember exactly what he said, so I’ll let you just catch the rerun on TV or Youtube.
What he said made the whole night worth it. It was so great to see everyone laugh at Kanye and to know that at least there are some other people out there that are as fed up with the man as I am – even if those people are Country singers. Yikes.